Interstellar Perversions. Bolder Than Love.
September 25
Song : Waiting On The World to Change/ I Don't Trust Myself/Belief (entire album. Continuum)
Movie: Just watched Manhattan. Woody Allen. He's a bastard. So is Nick Hornby. So am I. and so are a lotta other people, who secretly provide/look for their own reflection in everyone else. The lazy, I-am-all-that-matters, whiny, self-centred, Sun-revolves-around-the-Earth elitists who think that they're the bar when it comes to being a jack of all trades.
Mock Percentile: 95.71. Thats a fuckin slide of about 4%.
What a warehouse of bullshit. Thats just me describing myself. Thats what all the songs that I listen to define. Or anything else I find fascinating for that matter.
I find it relieving to find people who are anything like me, who share a form of weirdness or thought with me. To find that I'm really not insane. And if I am, then I'm not the only one. And infront of these people I can take the risk of saying things which I'm normally only allowed to think, and others can only laugh/smile about it cuz they think so too, but don't really take the same risk.
I just watched Manhattan. (Spoilers ahead.. if you dumb bitches ever plan to watch it.) Watching these kinda movies is always a guilty pleasure.. Cuz the man on screen has a similar, if not the same kinda humor, and is in a situation where you can almost imagine yourself in, when you're 42.. even if thats twice my age.. So Isaac (woody) is this 42 yr old who starts goin out w a 17yr old whose quite hung up on him.. an he's got a married friend who's seeing a German hottie, and the German hottie hates the fact tht he's married, doesn't wanna break his marriage, so breaks up with him, and Isaac tells the 17 yr old to buzz off, and they start seein each other, an then the german hottie realizes she's still in love with the friend, leaves Isie to die. Isie runs back to the 17 yr old, who turns 18, an leaves for London to be an actress. Lol. Cut gaya..
But in such movies, the deal is never really about whats happening to the man.. Its more about the way he handles it.. Indiferrence.. with bouts of anger and self pity which dont ever come out.. Like.. the whole rejected, bound to shit thing taken as just another stride. All of these movies become hits and favorites cuz of people like me. We take pleasures and smile and get amused easily by such movies.. Cuz we're the ones who really try and "keep a foot out the door". And thats "suicide.. By tiny, tiny increments..". So when we see some chap in a movie in such a situation, what we really feel is nothing.. and thats what is really amusing.. that we feel nothing for the other person, cuz for once, we get to be in the 'other' person's shoes.
So yesterday was one of those good days where you do nothing but spend time with friends.. Smokering, Eta and Maddie, who also happen to give you good company with smokes and awesome weather in CP. And then it gets better when you take a drag with a piece of chocolate in your mouth. And its like the 3rd last or 4th last song of a newly opened killer album, where you're completely settled in with the sound of the album, and are also aware that theres still 3 or 4 songs more to go. Bullshit. Time freezes and it feels good. Thats all. And when its over, you graciously say goodnight to the new pair of lovers and look forward to what life has in store for you next, waiting for time to freeze again.
So I went out for a smoke tonight.. And I just have to do something about it.. Cuz now I've been thinking about sneaking in cigarettes more than ever.. And thats not something that I cant do.. its just something I donwana do. Like.. right now.. I can probably kill for a cigarette, but I'm sitting here typing, glancing at the imaginary ashtray at times.
And now I've started avoiding the 3 and a half minute walk to the panwala and getting it from the lane behind my place.. Been getting by on Marlboro lights.. But still.. its good. Coupled with music that is. So good that I had 2 tonight.
Yawnn...french connection. gnite.
Movie: Just watched Manhattan. Woody Allen. He's a bastard. So is Nick Hornby. So am I. and so are a lotta other people, who secretly provide/look for their own reflection in everyone else. The lazy, I-am-all-that-matters, whiny, self-centred, Sun-revolves-around-the-Earth elitists who think that they're the bar when it comes to being a jack of all trades.
Mock Percentile: 95.71. Thats a fuckin slide of about 4%.
What a warehouse of bullshit. Thats just me describing myself. Thats what all the songs that I listen to define. Or anything else I find fascinating for that matter.
I find it relieving to find people who are anything like me, who share a form of weirdness or thought with me. To find that I'm really not insane. And if I am, then I'm not the only one. And infront of these people I can take the risk of saying things which I'm normally only allowed to think, and others can only laugh/smile about it cuz they think so too, but don't really take the same risk.
I just watched Manhattan. (Spoilers ahead.. if you dumb bitches ever plan to watch it.) Watching these kinda movies is always a guilty pleasure.. Cuz the man on screen has a similar, if not the same kinda humor, and is in a situation where you can almost imagine yourself in, when you're 42.. even if thats twice my age.. So Isaac (woody) is this 42 yr old who starts goin out w a 17yr old whose quite hung up on him.. an he's got a married friend who's seeing a German hottie, and the German hottie hates the fact tht he's married, doesn't wanna break his marriage, so breaks up with him, and Isaac tells the 17 yr old to buzz off, and they start seein each other, an then the german hottie realizes she's still in love with the friend, leaves Isie to die. Isie runs back to the 17 yr old, who turns 18, an leaves for London to be an actress. Lol. Cut gaya..
But in such movies, the deal is never really about whats happening to the man.. Its more about the way he handles it.. Indiferrence.. with bouts of anger and self pity which dont ever come out.. Like.. the whole rejected, bound to shit thing taken as just another stride. All of these movies become hits and favorites cuz of people like me. We take pleasures and smile and get amused easily by such movies.. Cuz we're the ones who really try and "keep a foot out the door". And thats "suicide.. By tiny, tiny increments..". So when we see some chap in a movie in such a situation, what we really feel is nothing.. and thats what is really amusing.. that we feel nothing for the other person, cuz for once, we get to be in the 'other' person's shoes.
So yesterday was one of those good days where you do nothing but spend time with friends.. Smokering, Eta and Maddie, who also happen to give you good company with smokes and awesome weather in CP. And then it gets better when you take a drag with a piece of chocolate in your mouth. And its like the 3rd last or 4th last song of a newly opened killer album, where you're completely settled in with the sound of the album, and are also aware that theres still 3 or 4 songs more to go. Bullshit. Time freezes and it feels good. Thats all. And when its over, you graciously say goodnight to the new pair of lovers and look forward to what life has in store for you next, waiting for time to freeze again.
So I went out for a smoke tonight.. And I just have to do something about it.. Cuz now I've been thinking about sneaking in cigarettes more than ever.. And thats not something that I cant do.. its just something I donwana do. Like.. right now.. I can probably kill for a cigarette, but I'm sitting here typing, glancing at the imaginary ashtray at times.
And now I've started avoiding the 3 and a half minute walk to the panwala and getting it from the lane behind my place.. Been getting by on Marlboro lights.. But still.. its good. Coupled with music that is. So good that I had 2 tonight.
Yawnn...french connection. gnite.
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